tips for parenting a toddler on a budget
Who doesn’t need more tips for parenting a toddler on a budget?! When you have a child, you quickly see expenses pile up - from nappies to formula, childcare to baby classes, doctors visits to buying the next size of clothes every 6 weeks (seriously, they grow so fast) to entertaining their busy little minds! Moving into the toddler phase you start to focus on a broader variety of items for your kids - you need to support their development in all areas so you look more into how they can socialise, learn, play and grow with the support of you and what you have at home. You also start to see their behaviour open up, so you need things around you to support those needs. Here’s some tips from my own experience (hi, I’m JK!) to hopefully help you on your journey as a parent. I have two boys under 5. Send help.
I became a mum at the start of 2019, and wow have I been on a steep learning curve, not just about how to be a parent, but how to “money” as a parent (ouch). We came into parenthood without much cash. In the 5 years leading up to having our first child I’d been a full-time musician. But I don’t apologise or feel bad about it - I was in an industry I loved, and I set out to get skilled up in building a family life for us, without the big price tag. I always tried to remind myself it’s not about how much money we had, but how we managed it that counted.
Parenting and money are so entwined, and you’re constantly doing the dance of working to provide for your kids, but not working so much that you don’t get to spend time parenting and being present with your kids. It feels like a really unbalanced see-saw that tips one way then the other. Also, we want our kids to have the best chance at daycare/preschool/school, life, experiences, activities - we want them to have the world! But that’s assuming we have an endless [non-existent] pot of gold. I’ve by no means nailed it, but I’m hoping I can share some of the things I’m learning. May we all parent the best we can, with enough money for our families to grow and have fun. And may we all sleep in. Ok that last one probably won’t happen for a while.
#1 remember what kids need: to be and feel loved
This is more a mindset point. Imagine walking into those big baby chain stores - there are endless choices of clothes, toys, things for home, books, car seats, pretty things you can buy for your kids. And man the pull is strong. I wanted to spend money so badly as I knew my kids would LOVE some of the things I saw. Big brands have become so brilliant at making exactly what you know your kids will want, and they know you’re willing to pull out the credit card for it.
But as I literally pulled myself away (so hard to walk away from the Bluey shelf, amirite?) I had to remind myself that a) we have enough stuff for our kids at home already and b) what they really needs is to be and feel loved. There are so many ways to show this to kids without buying them things. I’m not saying buying them nice things is bad - I do it too - but I’m trying not to default to “I love my kid = shopping”.
What can you do instead? Spend time. Put your phone down, tap out of work, and go and do something together. After preschool or on weekends go kick a ball around, ride your bike at the park, build a fort in the living room, do some crafty activity, ask them what their favourite activity is and do that with them. Focus on building memories before buying them stuff. They’ll remember those memories for the rest of their life.
#2 rotate toys
This has been a life saver. Rotate their toys. Choose 5 major toy items for them to play with for the week, space them out on a shelf for them clearly to see, then stash the rest of their toys in a cupboard so they forget about them. Come Sunday night, choose 5 new items and rotate. I’ve noticed that if all our kids toys are all over the living room they start becoming invisible. But if they only sees them once a month, suddenly they’re interesting again.
#3 use non-toy toys
How many times have you bought a flashy toy, and all they want to play with is the tupperware pantry or an old toilet roll? It’s laughable. There are some items that provide hours of entertainment and you already have them at home. Explore your home (kitchen especially) for things that look/are interesting to fiddle with - old baby bottles, pots, big bowls, general tupperware, wooden spoons and spatulas. Also, yep toilet rolls, empty boxes from deliveries, fabric, tissue boxes, cushions, organising boxes and tubs.
#4 buy open-ended toys/things that provide endless entertainment
To maximise the how long your kids play with toys, look to invest in open-ended play toys. This means toys that don’t have a singular goal - toys that can be adapted to all kinds of games and play. Some items never lose their entertainment value (or at least keep them entertained a little big longer). Here’s the items that have worked for us:
A collapsible play tunnel or play tent
Balls and ball runs
Trikes/bikes
Building blocks or Duplo
Dress ups with your old clothes or costumes
Forts and cubbies
Blowing bubbles
Puzzles
A plastic shell pool is great for water or sand play - remember to supervise them
Musical toys
Chalk
Paints
Sets with plastic animals or dinosaurs
Books!
Playdough (make it yourself so you can make it anytime!)
Magnets - it doesn’t have to be those expensive magnet kits - look for cheaper alphabet, number and animal sets to play with on the fridge. Remember to supervise for this one.
#5 utilise free/cheap ways to entertain little people
Now is the time to get really good at doing things on the cheap (or free)! This is especially important at a time where your income as a family is impacted, but you also need to keep their little minds busy, learning, having fun and socialising:
Organise playdates with their friends or your friends with kids.
Walk to the park/oval for a good grassy runaround.
Get out into nature - check out bushwalks, beaches, lakes, mountains or snow, whatever is close to you.
Sign up to a local toy library.
Get your little ones into gardening.
Organise messy things like paint, bubbles, food like spaghetti, slime, playdough.
Water play is always a winner - just pour some water in any container you have, chuck some food colouring in to make it colourful and pop some wet-friendly toys in.
Pull out some trusty ol’ paper plane is surprisingly effective.
Print out colouring in sheets from ABC Kids.
Buy a laminator and make all sorts of stuff for them to play with - eating placemats, puppets with paddle pop sticks, pictures for the walls in their bedroom, print and hide pics of their favourite characters/animals all around the house.
Libraries run a heap of free singalong/book/activity classes for kids - check out what’s on offer close to you. Also get a library account for your child and borrow ebooks and audiobooks for free.
Join a local play group run by community groups.
Podcasts and audio stories are a big thing for little ones now! You can enjoy these wherever you get podcasts.
Check out Instagram which is flooded with great activity ideas for toddlers, and read blogs for activity ideas like Imagination Tree, Busy Toddler and Bright Star Kids.
#6 make the most of child & family related subsidies
Alright, the subject we all love to hate. Daycare is expensive. It is, and I feel your pain - we held off until our first child was 15 months old before we sent him to daycare because we couldn’t afford it. To be real there’s really not much we can do to change the cost of daycare. Instead we tried to change the way we thought about it so our mindset is (hopefully) more positive and we look for all opportunities available to us to reduce it's cost:
Deduct the cost of child care from both of your incomes. Dear Primary Caregiver, if you choose to go back to work, don’t deduct the cost of childcare from your income alone. Deduct it from the cost of yours AND your partners’ income (if relevant). Another mum told me this and it’s been a brilliant mindset shifter in helping us think about the cost.
Do look into ALL family and child-related subsidies you are eligible for. As painful as it is dealing with the process of making the application, it’s worth the frustration. Take any assistance you can get and don’t apologise for it. We live in a country where subsidies are available. It’s part of the reason we pay tax - to look after families. If you’re child has a disability, seek out any disability support or funding you can get. If your little one needs to go to daycare, look into your eligibility for the childcare subsidy. See whether you can get any rent or study assistance. See whether the family tax benefit scheme is something you can access. Jump on the Centrelink portal and fill out their questionnaire to see what you’re eligible for. Also ensure you keep your income updated so you don’t run the risk of being over or underpaid and have to pay any subsidies back. This can be a real pain for families, so make it a priority to keep your income updated.
Do compare child care centres and their cost. We went with a family daycare first as that suited our vibe, but it was also a bit cheaper (in our case). Some centres charge upwards of $145 a day before any subsidies. Call ahead and spreadsheet up the centres you like, and their fees. Sadly there’s no hard and fast rule for figuring out how much of this cost will be covered by subsidies - they assess your income and come back to you with a figure. Check out this website with information about how much you might expect to receive in subsidies. But if you are tight for cash, consider all the options out there.
#7 maximise secondhand buys + buy new clothes at the end of major seasons
A big portion of the things you’ll need with toddlers are available secondhand. All of my kids’ clothing is bought in big bags of their size on Facebook marketplace. Kids grow out of sizes so fast so for $20 you can get a whole bag of summer/winter clothes and they’re getting the clothes they needs without spending $20 per item. Then you only spend money on the clothing items can’t find secondhand or that need to be new like undies. Or ask family members to gift items that might be a little out of price range - never underestimate how much others want to lavish gifts on your little one! We bought a secondhand pram for $165 (Babyjogger City Mini GT) and it has been THE best thing ever - so reliable, it’s been covered in food and water, folds up small, I can use it one-handed, I can replace parts as needed - it’s so good. We also used a baby capsule in the early days (Maxi Cosi Air) which we bought for $100 and then later sold for $100. Win! You can do this with heaps of stuff. The best category to search secondhand for toddlers is toys! And when your toddlers are bored with them, pop them back on marketplace.
If you are buying clothes new get into a rhythm of buying at the end of summer and the end of winter, with the next size up in mind. You can get hugely discounted clothing on the next size your kids will be moving into without paying full retail price, and the clothing is brand new. Stash them in a cupboard for next season, and continue this forever, and ever, and ever.
#8 get super organised with food
I don’t know if it’s just a boy thing but my kids eat so much food, so when it comes to budgeting for food the grocery bill each week grows and grows. We also want to set healthy habits with food so going cheap with pre-packaged food isn’t going to cut it for us. We do buy a couple of packaged things each week, because despite the packaging, they are easy when out and about. But generally speaking we aim for fresh stuff that’s in season - trying to use fruit & veggies as much as possible to be able to buy items in-season, and the waste can be turned into compost in our backyard. Meal prepping has also been the best way to save money - we’ve managed to make meals stretch more, we buy less items at each shop and we’re still feeling well-fed! Check out our meal prepping blog if this is something you’re keen to try.
Also, depending on what your typical grocery spend looks like, you may find that one supermarket ends up costing you less to buy your groceries each week. We try to buy local with a fruit, vegetable, egg and meat delivery service that operates near us. For other pantry items we buy from Coles, maximising any Flybuys points we can. Use whichever supermarket chain works out better for your family, and collect as many rewards points as you can to save up some money or points for Christmas time!
#9 use your village
This is so underrated. Culturally in Australia we have kind of lost touch of the village concept (or at least we have to work a bit harder to recreate it) because we all live so individually. We buy our own separate houses, we don’t have family living with us anymore - but there’s so much power in pooling resources with family and friends. Hook in with other parents and share toys, take turns looking after kids, swap clothing, make meals for each other. We need each other so much right now.
#10 don’t apologise
Don’t feel bad if you’re parenting on a budget. Don’t apologise for spending less on your kids than perhaps some other parents. It doesn’t mean you love your kids less than anyone else. Focus on being present with your kids - nothing replaces face to face fun, time and experiences. Focus on making memories with them - you’ll both remember and cherish that more.
